ARF Canine Support Group
Serenity for the “difficult dog” owner
You may have heard that a new group is starting at the Paw Market, in Longmont, CO. It is a group for people with pets that come with extra behavioral baggage, such as anxiousness, reactivity or fearfulness (ARF). If you have ever lived with an animal like this you know how stressful and isolating it can be. Inspired by a few similar groups propping up around the country, we are excited to offer a space for owners of difficult pets to get together to talk, vent, offer advice and support for one another.
While discussing the new group at a recent staff meeting, I was teased about how we would recite the infamous “Serenity Prayer” known for its use in recovery meetings. I giggled along with everyone, but a couple days later, I found myself compelled to look it up:
I could immediately see why this proverb is so popular. It’s universal, and it offers some wonderful guidance for the owner of an ARF dog.
Accepting your dog is kindness enacted.
We know you would do anything to help your behavior challenged pet. You want to solve all the problems, for their sake and yours. While training and behavior modification will most definitely improve things, some pets may always require extra space or other accommodations. Struggling against something that cannot change is a recipe for suffering. Accepting your pet in her entirety is the kindest thing you can do.
Training a reactive dog takes guts.
What is more courageous than taking the time and effort to train a dog that regularly embarasses you in public?! When all that barking, lunging, and growling elicits bewildered and judgmental looks from bystanders, it takes an iron will to keep going. This is especially true when you know that your dog may never be “perfect.” You are doing the work to improve your pet’s quality of life anyway, and that is the most courageous thing of all.
Wisdom is the marrow in the bone.
How do you make the effort to train your dog and let go of attachment to the outcome at the same time? That’s the wisdom and the challenge. It is also perhaps the richest area for growth offered through our relationships with dogs and one I hope to explore more in our meetings.
So if you are caring for an anxious, reactive or fearful (ARF) dog, come join us the first Friday of every month at the Paw Market. Maybe we’ll revisit the serenity prayer, maybe we won’t. One thing is for sure, there will be cookies.
Please take a minute to sign up here (please scroll to the next months ‘first’ Friday) . The support group is free but it helps us to know how many are attending (you know, we need a cookie/coffee count!). See you there!
Guest post by Haley N. Tripp-Fire, MSW, AASW, KPA-CTP, facilitator to this support group.